Challenging Myself. Part 1

Words and language are how we communicate. Language is a powerful tool that is used to convey meaning and intention. Love. Hate. Ambivalence. Joy. Happiness. All emotions we can share because of language. When you say to someone, “fuck off” the meaning is clear. Other expressions like “I love you” or “I want to be friends with you” can sometimes be vague and misunderstood.  A word like “God” might have unlimited meaning. It would seem, most language is conveyed based on context. I want to share four expressions that carry a lot of meaning for me. Expressions that help define who I am. Expressions that help define who I am.  That help me keep the horizon of my life in focus.

I am not looking for the perfect expression of those words. They help keep me aligned with the most authentic expression of who I am and want to become. They don’t represent some perfect state I am trying to achieve.  Rather a path for me to that helps guide through my life. A way to bring myself back to center and a deeper sense of self when I am lost or distracted by the circumstances of life.  Ways of being that I want to continually want to grow into.

The first two terms come directly from ManKind Project or MKP. ManKind Project supports a global network of over 1,000 peer-facilitated men’s groups where men mentor men through the passages of their lives. MKP continues to provide a deep rooted sense of community. I have never experienced such a profound sense of love and acceptance from an amazing group of men. More importantly it provides a space of accountability for myself. I need this group of men to make sure that I don’t veer off too far in any one direction in my life.

During the MKP weekly meetings two questions are asked of each man. The first is, are you accountable? Basically, have you kept all your agreements with the men in this group? The second question is are you in integrity with yourself? I like those questions. They are direct and to the point. For me, it is not only keeping the agreements with the men in the group, but my life in general. Am I making promises I can’t keep. Big or small. Do I even inadvertently forget a promise that I made?

The second question is about integrity. My own personal integrity. For me, integrity is about honoring who I am now in this moment and making sure I continue to honor the vision of my own personal and spiritual growth. Am I willing to make the hard decisions about my own personal choices. Integrity for me is a willingness to step up and not take the easy way out.

These challenges are not meant to absolute. They are meant to handrails for your life. To keep you upright and pointed in the right direction. They can be hard and challenging. I have lost count on how many times I have failed to fulfill these pledges to myself.  

There is a lot more to write about. That’s why there will be a part 2. It will be about impeccability, sobriety as a person and most importantly who cares and why bother.

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