There are two other terms that carry a lot of significance in my life. They are continual reminders to make sure I am living the life I image for myself. I need them to help me realign myself, to find my “center” when I I get derailed. Because there is a certainty that will happen. The first is the word Sobriety. The second is Being Impeccable.
When I talk about Sobriety, I am not referring to people that are challenged with substance abuse. I am referring to a quality of character. A behavior. A way to move through life. A way to interact with people. People that you are close to, that are important to you and other on the periphery of your life.
So, what is sobriety? How does a sober human being behave? The short answer is, are you living a life that is basically sane? Or is your life easily disrupted by the moment-to-moment challenges that life presents?
Here are just a few things to consider in terms of living life as a sober human being.
- Do you make decisions from a place of fear or anger?
- Are you able to pause and back away when you feel triggered?
- Do you act out of anger?
- Do you need to be right?
- Can you be happy for someone else’s success?
- Are you dependable?
- Can you respect other’s belief systems that are different than yours?
- Is the need to be right more important that being in relationship?
- Are you afraid to fail or make mistakes?
- Are you kind?
- Can you be fair?
- Do you know how to show love?
- Can you ask for help? Any help.
- Can you distinguish between the story you are telling yourself from what is really happening in your life?
- And maybe the most important, are you willing to risk for your happiness?
There are way too many examples to list them all. I think this list can give you a fairly good idea of how a sober person should moves through life.
If first came across the concept of living impeccably when reading The Teaching of Don Juan, A Yaqui Way of Knowledge. Don Juan would often tell his student, Carlos Castaneda that he has to life the life of an Impeccable Warrior. That really resonated with me. It took me a long time to understand how that might apply to my life.
For me, being impeccable is living my live fiercely. Standing up for the truth of who I am. When I am knocked down, can I get back up and face the challenges I am confronted with as a sober human being.
As I had mentioned in part one, these challenges are not meant to absolute. They are meant to handrails for your life. To keep you upright and pointed in the right direction. They can be hard and challenging. Sometimes just fucking hard. I have lost count on how many times I have failed to fulfill these pledges to myself. You might even ask yourself, why even bother. Who cares. I have what I want. If that’s your truth, maybe what I shared is not meant for you. For me, I want to connect to the mystery of life in the deepest most profound way. For me, it’s about where I put my attention. This is an invitation to live your life fiercely. Live it with compassion for others. Live it with a clear mind, love in your heart. To lean into your life. At the end of the day, there is no other choice then living as an impeccable warrior.
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