I find most people, including myself often look for validation. Validation from the people in our lives.  Significant others. Parents. Friends. Boyfriend or girlfriend. Co-workers. Most people struggle just to be OK being themselves. Why is it not enough to be just who we are?

Many time our sense of well-being is determined by people you have no direct personal connect with. Social media plays a significant role in determining how we see ourselves. Like most of us, I get news feeds pushed to my phone. I am always curious about the people in our culture with the biggest influence. I guess that is why they are called influencers. I often follow the Kardashian’s. I feel it is important to be aware of what is happening in popular culture. So, I Googled them. I wanted to know how many followers they have on Instagram. @kimkardashian Instagram follower count is currently at 329.4 and @kyliejenner has more than 305 million followers. That’s a lot of influence. Does what they have to say matter that much? I guess so. What do they know that the rest of us don’t? Why do their opinions carry so much weight?

Maybe most importantly, why do what they have to say often have such a big impact on how we see ourselves.

I have influencers in my life. They tend to be people that know me. That have my best interest in mind. They help keep me accountable. They offer insight and feed back about some of the decisions I make. They help reflect my life back to me. Maybe the best question in this blog is, who do you influence? We all influence someone.

We entrain to the people we hang out with. Our lives align with the people we spend the most time with. Out behaviors. Our attitudes. How we see ourselves. How we treat other people. Considering all this, who do you really want to be influenced by?

We all struggle to be ourselves. To find the most genuine expression of ourselves. We don’t need to conjure some nebulous idea of how we should be. I have found that just being myself has helped create the life I want. Being real will draw other real people to you. They will love and except you for who you are. There is a saying in ManKind Project. “All of you is welcome”. That is a powerful statement. It invites acceptance. From a place of acceptance of who we are, personal growth is most possible. I want to be around people who live that. The wrong influencers only diminish who you really are.

My want for you, for myself is to bring ourselves forward in the most vulnerable, authentic way possible in any given moment. That is were true gold is found.